Relationships, what are they, how do we go through them, or better yet why do we start one!
That’s a tough question that every human being on gods green earth has faced one time or another.I’ve been a busy person through out my life, I never had time to look into such things, I’m more of a solo player if you may call it.
Though lately a few little things happened that made me think about it all, why do people stick together, how do they endure each others flaws, why is it a long-lived habit of finding a “ mate “ to spend time with.And then it hit me, life is a lot of things, and one of them is a journey to reach somewhere, whether it’s to carry out your dreams, raise your kids, serve your country or whatever goal each person of us rationalize life for it to be.
All what I’ve previously mentioned have one thing in common, and that life is a journey. Now if you look closely at the word ‘relationship’ you somehow find a few words standing out, and these are relative, on, ship. So in other words! Relati-on-ship is another form of “relatively being on a ship” and whats better for our journey to start than by having a sailor helping us through the rough waves of time. To help us sail through it, around it, and sometimes even against it.
I guess that’s the common goal of a relationship, it’s to find a person who you will sail with you to accomplish both of your journeys. If not a long-lived journey, at least to get you through a part of it until a better sailor-match comes by again. But where does that leaves us solo players in the scheme of journey vs time ?That’s something I’ve been pondering about lately. Some people love the company of others, some people yearn for it, others prefer solitude.
ok… so what’s normal? What’s to be expected? Where are the guide lines of life concerning such a thing.
We’ve all heard people saying no ones perfect, yet everyone is special in their own way. Well I disagree! I say that all of us are simply – Normal – as the mere fact that we as humans are going through a certain state, doing a certain act, enduring a certain situation. Makes it just that! Something.. NORMAL! You cannot come up with something that’s unnatural and inflict it on a natural being such as us human. you see soeciety tends to nromalize things the waythe majority see fit. but the way i see it, if a human being thought of it , did it , experienced it, than by all means! it’s normal.
with that in mind, is it normal to be in a relationship, or not?
Of course being in a relationship is not a goal in itself (even though it sometimes is for needy ppl) though what if we don’t want to be ? Or better yet, what if we’re too picky to find our own version of a fellow sailor that we’ve actually set the pedestal so high, that not even we can reach it if we were in their shoes.Thinking about all of this over and over again lead a simple late in the night thought to end up as a conflict of character vs social expectations vs human needs.
And what’s better for a conflict to end but by reaching a common ground? between my perfectionist nature, my forever challenge of being the best I can be and the social definition of relationships. I actually came up with a common ground with the help of William Arthur Ward. as He said:
“When we seek to discover the best in others, we somehow bring out the best in ourselves.”
And that lead me to believe, that by seeking relationship with others, if they match ,if they’re this if they’re that. You somehow tend to mold yourself to being a better person. And that my friends, is a very tempting outcome for a perfectionist. Let’s face it, whats more perfect than to mold yourself to be a better person? Even if it’s by the help of others. But then again, will I get to normalize myself to the normality of others? Or invent a new normal standard… i’ll keep you posted.